Learning To Tame The Tongue In An Age Of Verbal Toxicity

7 For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

(James 3:7-8)

In my almost 50 years of being in the ministry, I have talked and given many lessons and sermons on the tongue. These instructional and informative lessons and messages (that were biblically based) were shared to aid people in the proper, as well as the improper, use of the tongue. The previous passage is one of the most cited verses in the Bible that primarily focuses on the tongue. In my column today, I want to address why the tongue is so essential in each of our lives and how we use it can either be a source of constructive and positive influence or one that instigates conflict, discord, and division. There are some very common and crucial areas in our lives where we must put a guard on our tongue and be careful about what we say. Perhaps nothing else in our lives can be as self-incriminating before others as the words that we speak. You can often and almost immediately detect or identify a person of prudence and discretion by their words from the first encounter with them. The “Good Book” says that even a fool is perceived as being wise when he keeps silent (Proverbs 17:28). Most of us have experienced people who we thought were cultured, refined, and very learned due to their dress and appearance until they opened their mouths. In all honesty, it was not their grammatical deficiency, lack of properly pronouncing words, or any such trivial thing. It was their complete absence of demonstrating common sense and the very undisciplined way they ran off at the mouth and wanted to be a know-it-all.

The Man Who Sealed His Guilt by a Slip of the Tongue
Over the years, I have collected and retained many interesting, intriguing, and humorous stories in both memory and notes. One of the most memorable and comical incidences that I often laugh about (when it comes to mind) occurred in court when a man named Jason MacKenzie (not his real name) was being tried for molesting and raping his own underaged daughters. He evidently became so confident of his attempt to convince the judge that he was not guilty of what he was being accused of that he dropped his guard of deception. When he was asked how he was able to perpetrate something that was not related to what he was on trial for, his infamous and very incriminating response was, “I’d lie, if I had to”. With the slip of his tongue, he gave them compelling proof that he was also lying about being innocent in regard to molesting and raping his young daughters.

The Secretary of State Whose Political Waterloo Was His Unbridled Tongue
Most of us who are old enough, as well as those who are students of history, can well remember when President Ronald Reagan was almost assassinated by John Hinckley, Jr. on March 30, 1981, and the results that followed at the White House. Alexander Haig, who was the Secretary of State, made a very costly mistake when a news reporter asked him the question, “Who’s in charge now that the President has been rendered temporarily incapacitated?” Alexander Haig, who was not only the Secretary of State, but also a former four-star general over NATO blurted out, “I am in charge here!” Evidently, this man (who was accustomed to people coming to attention and following his orders) either forgot or did not know the line of succession if something happened to cause the President to not be able to function. The person next in line of succession after the President is the Vice President, then the Speaker of the House of Representatives, next the President Pro Tempore of the Senate, and finally the Secretary of State. Since he was fourth in the line of succession, Mr. Haig’s blunder of putting his foot in his mouth immediately destroyed his political ambitions to advance to the next level.

A Classic Biblical Example of a Toxic Tongue
“Then he began to curse and swear, saying, “I do not know the Man!” Immediately a rooster crowed.” (Mathew 26:74)

I chose the previous incident to illustrate how anyone (if they are not careful) can be put in a situation that will incite them to temporarily lose control of their tongue and say some things that they will later regret. Simon Peter was one of the disciples that Jesus chose to be one of his three inner circle men along with James and John. These three were present with Jesus during all the essential events and moments of His life. He is one of my favorite characters of the Bible that I can readily identify with. Nevertheless, he was very human and a man with feet of iron and clay who had flaws and made mistakes, as we all do. He was known for being impetuous and speaking without thinking sometimes. In the previous incident, Simon Peter’s unbridled tongue was in full force and caused him to act contrary to what he had gleaned from Christ for three and a half years. Though lying, swearing, and cursing are things that all followers of Christ are forbidden to do, when put on the spot and fearing the consequences of owning up to his association with Christ, his toxic tongue, without hesitation, blurted out all three profanities.
Considering the objective of this column today, we are going to close with two very relevant biblical passages that will help you to tame and bridle your tongue:
“Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles.” (Proverbs 21:23)

“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” (Ephesians 4:29)

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