Last week’s article by Mrs. Se’Lisa Scott, “Autism: A Closer Look,” was a well-written eye-opener that I wish everyone would read. Due to its nature and importance, I deem it necessary to do a follow-up that will in some way help to bring more attention, assistance, and empathy to the children, and their families, who are challenged by autism or other birth defects. Too often many people have passed judgment and criticism on both the parents and the children who have behavioral challenges without an inkling of the real reason why the child may act the way they are acting.
Thank you, Se’Lisa, for sharing your personal testimony and experience of being a mother who had to face a horrible truth – the reality that your baby, your toddler son was autistic. I know how hard this ugly truth hit both you and your husband who have had to shoulder the weight of this situation. I was there watching, praying, and shedding tears with both of you as you adjusted your lives, your time, and priorities in order to be there for your son. Considering the growing number of children with autism and other special needs who are in our midst, how can we help the parents and families who have been given the very demanding responsibilities of caring and rearing these children into adulthood? There is no way we can overlook or deny their presence and special needs. Nearly every family, church, school, and community have these special and precious children living among them. These God-sent little ones have been divinely placed to challenge our faith, our patience, and especially our love. I believe that there is something we can all do to help assure that these special children will receive all the help they need in order to adjust and overcome the challenges by which they are beset. Let me list a few of the things that each of us can do that will help to assist the parents and families of children with special needs.
Do Not Be Presumptuous and Critical of Every Child Who Is Acting Out
I cannot recall or remember exactly when, but I know at some point, place, and time in the past I made the terrible mistake of assuming that a child who was misbehaving was doing so because of poor upbringing or gross negligence on the behalf of the parent or caregiver who was right there with them. “Certainly,” I said like many of you in my ignorance, “they need to get a handle on that child and stop them from misbehaving in this place.” Perhaps it was at church, Wal-Mart, or in some other place. It really does not matter where or when it happened. What matters is that it did happen. I confess that I, like many of you, have been guilty of speaking in ignorance and presumption about a child with special needs or one who has challenges that cause them to seemingly misbehave because of autism or some other genetic reason that they could not control. I believe that one of the first steps to aid children with disabilities and their families is through empathy and refraining from being critical and judgmental of every child who may be acting out. Whether you believe it or not, there are some children who act out because they cannot help themselves.
Offer Your Time to Relieve Parents and Caregivers
One of the ways that some of us can help children who are autistic and other children with special needs, as well as their families, is to offer our time. Parents and caregivers of children with autism and other challenges and disabilities are often worn out in the ongoing battle to properly attend to the needs of their children. Many are so overwhelmed with the responsibility of taking care of them that they are at risk of succumbing to either physical or mental exhaustion or occasionally both. When friends and family members are willing to pitch in and offer an occasional hand to these hard-pressed parents and primary caregivers, it can makes a world of difference.
Financial Assistance
The final thing that all of us can do to help children with disabilities and their families is to offer some financial assistance. Organizations like You Are Not Alone (Y.A.N.A.) Special Needs Ministry can always use money to help curtail the expenses of trying to rear or to provide some special services for children with special needs. Your financial help can aid a family in more ways than one. It can assure that they will have sufficient funds to take their children to doctor’s appointments that are often way out of town. It can help with medicine that is often outrageously high, especially if the family has little or no insurance. Finally, it can help them to find and afford the right babysitter or aid to help attend to their children while they take a much needed break.
I have only submitted a few ways that we can help the children who have special needs and their families. Certainly, there are more ways to help than I have the space to include here. However, I will say that words of encouragement and a little prayer for both the children and parents will surely work when nothing else will. Again, I say that these children with special needs are special gifts from God to try all of us, not just their parents.
