The very thought of doing this piece today made me cringe due to the potential and prospect of self-defamation and public humiliation. After all, what sense does it make for any sane and rational-minded person to expose and share their flaws and faults in a public forum or medium? Invariably, most normal people would only want to share and talk with others about their strengths, achievements, and positives. It is certainly unusual and borders between absurdity, and perhaps insanity, for someone to publically display their dirty laundry and darker elements of their character and make-up. Now, I do not want my family, friends, and church members to become alarmed and believe that I have suddenly taken a flight over the cuckoo’s nest. My intention today is solely experimental and exploration. Admittedly, it is autobiographical and a tad bit satirical; however, I am breaking new ground here and venturing into an area I have never gone before. So, I encourage those of you who routinely read my column to bear with me in this attempt and I assure you that I will resume my normalcy next week.
Now that I have hopefully established with you the why of this literary endeavor, I shall present to you the meat of the matter. Bear in mind that though I admit to these flaws and negatives, I am striving (through much discipline and diligence) to master them, in order that I might be more proficient and productive as a very flawed member of a very flawed species called human beings. Arguably, one of my greatest failings and flaws is the fact that I am messy. Most of you reading this will certainly understand that in slang terminology, a messy person is someone who keeps things in a mess or untidy state. My wife, who has endeavored for years to help me to overcome this almost addictive disorder of leaving things in an untidy condition once they have been made or set in a neat and tidy state, will be the first to tell you that I have a problem in this area. She has all but thrown up her hands and given up on me in regards to this. Even my poor secretary (who makes it her job to straighten up my desk that I often leave in such a disarray) can attest to the fact that I am messy. While I am writing this article, I can see the untidy and disorderly condition all around me that I have been guilty of imposing upon my den (where I do most of my writing and studying when I am at home). Though I have not completely overcome being messy, I am certainly trying my level best to do so.
Another one of my great challenges has been the battle to overcome the age old foe of procrastination. I have contended with this personal weakness ever since I was an emerging teenager. I know that my propensity, or better yet, practice of postponing things that I should be doing today until tomorrow or another time in the future, has been a thief that has robbed me of many opportunities and blessings. Though I am overcoming procrastination and have come a very long way in my struggle, I am not out of the woods yet.
The next fault or failing that I must own up to, if I ever expect to get the victory, is the practice of being curious or downright nosey. Perhaps my nosiness comes from two different sources. First, my mother has always been an inquisitive person ever since I have known her. She would almost always ask people (who she did not know) what their names were and who their people were. Well, I find myself following in the steps of my mama when I meet people that I do not know personally or recognize. Then and perhaps the greatest reason why I battle with nosiness is due to writer’s curiosity. I believe that every true writer (especially those who are creative and investigative) have an innate capacity or nature to be nosey. Certainly the masters of literature like, Geoffrey Chaucer, William Shakespeare, Hans Christian Anderson, Charles Dickens, Mark Twain, and many others were inquisitive and nosey. I have learned that two of the attributes of learning or acquiring knowledge is observation and investigation. One has to be just a little nosey to inquire and ask questions if they are going to succeed in an investigation. When I tell my wife and daughter that I am just curious, their response is, “No, you are just downright nosey!” So, I will own up to it. I am curious, inquisitive, and downright nosey.
The final of my many faults and flaws that I will share with you today that I am striving to bring under subjection to the betterment of myself is that I am argumentative. Yes, you heard it right. Due to the fact that I come from a band of brothers who loved to argue and debate their point when we were growing up, I have been predisposed to be argumentative. There are times when this disputing disposition has been very advantageous and constructive. Nevertheless, I am working hard to keep it under wraps until it is needed, either to defend the faith or for some other worthwhile cause.
So, there you have it. I have publically shared some of my failings with you and it has indeed been very relieving and therapeutic to do so. Join me next week as I get back to my more routine way of writing.
P.S. I am full of excitement and expectation of the soon to be release of my first published novel. It has been a long time coming!